The Energy of Emotions

Eating disorders often serve the purpose of numbing us out, letting us escape from the pain and suffering of our daily lives. 

We feel sad, angry, hopeless, helpless, overwhelmed, etc --> 

we use eating disorder symptoms --> 

we feel numb. 

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. 

We think we're getting rid of the emotions. 

But the thing is, we're not. 

We're just pushing them down. 

I like to think of emotions as energy.  When we use eating disorder symptoms, we're pushing the emotions down.  Think of a trash compactor...it's as if every time we use symptoms we're compressing and compacting our emotions down.  However, instead of getting rid of the emotions like we think, the energy actually just builds. 

And build.  And builds. 

That's the problem.  When we use symptoms, we're not actually solving anything - we're making it worse.  The energy builds and then at some point we get completely bombarded. 

The emotions overwhelm us, come out sideways, scare us, and make us feel incapable and incompetent.

 

So imagine that your emotions are energy. 

Instead of compressing and pushing them down, think of fluidity.  Imagine your emotions are flowing through you. 

Sadness comes --> it's intense and scary --> we breathe, cry, shake, etc. --> and then we let the emotions flow through us. 

 

Don't get me wrong...this is NOT easy.  It is the furthest thing from easy.  But perhaps this image can serve you when the next wave of your emotion approaches. 

 

Compress your emotions and let them build up (just so they can overwhelm you later), or deal with them now and let them flow through you?