Window of Tolerance

I have been wanting to write about the window of tolerance for a long time.  It has only been directly addressed in one treatment center that I attended, and I think it is incredibly helpful...

The window of tolerance refers to a zone of "emotional arousal that is optimal for well-being and effective functioning," (Siegel, 1999). 

When we are within our window of tolerance, we are able to effectively cope with, process, and integrate emotional arousal.  However, when we are outside our window of tolerance, we are unable to complete these essential functions. 

The Energy of Emotions

Eating disorders often serve the purpose of numbing us out, letting us escape from the pain and suffering of our daily lives. 

We feel sad, angry, hopeless, helpless, overwhelmed, etc --> 

we use eating disorder symptoms --> 

we feel numb. 

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. 

We think we're getting rid of the emotions. 

But the thing is, we're not. 

We're just pushing them down. 

To Feel or Not to Feel

An important part of the recovery process is learning to identify and experience emotions.  It is common for people in the early stages of recovery to go through what I call the "thawing out phase."  Often, one of the purposes of the eating disorder is to numb emotions.  As people begin to replace the eating disorder with healthier coping mechanisms, it is common for emotions to emerge.  It can feel uncomfortable and even scary when emotions start to surface.   

Many people wonder, "now that my emotions are here, what am I supposed to do with them???"  Although it is important to experience your emotions, it is also valuable to know when to contain them.   

Below is a brief assessment to help you decide whether to experience or contain your emotions, followed by  suggestions on how to experience your emotions in a healthy way.

Identifying and Experiencing Emotions

For many, an eating disorder serves as a way to numb emotions.  Many people with eating disorders have a difficult time identifying their emotions, and may only experience "negative" or painful emotions.  When faced with the task of identifying their emotions, they may feel confused or even angry..."why do I need to feel my feelings if all I feel is pain?"  People with eating disorders are also often out of practice at experiencing, expressing, and moving through their emotions.  In many ways, the eating disorder has been their coping tool for dealing with difficult emotions, or even their way of communicating with others.  Therefore, it is important to learn how to experience and express emotions in a healthy and effective way.