Benefits and Consequences of the ED

We know that eating disorders are dangerous and cause us pain.  We are told that our eating disorders lie to us and manipulate us.  The  losses caused by our eating disorders have been tremendous... relationships, family events, school, jobs, connection with our spirituality, confidence, our ability to feel joy, and so much more.

We know we SHOULD let go of the eating disorder.  And yet... many of us continue to hold on.  Why?  Although we know that eating disorders have many consequences, we wouldn't hold on to them if they didn't give us something in return.  

In order to work on recovery, it is imperative that we examine both the consequences and the benefits of our eating disorders.  When thinking about the benefits, it is important to recognize that they have probably changed and evolved over time.  Perhaps in the initial stages the eating disorder promised us that we would be healthier, happier, and get more attention.  Now, the eating disorder may provide us a feeling of comfort, safety or control.  

Once you identify what your eating disorder is providing for you, you can begin to recognize and label your needs that the eating disorder is fulfilling.  Then you can brainstorm healthier ways to fulfill those needs.  For example, one benefit of the eating disorder may be that you receive attention from others.  A different way to fulfill this need would be to share your emotions with close friends or family, including your struggles, dreams and/or achievements. 

Step by step and piece by piece, you can begin to let go of the eating disorder and recognize healthier and more effective ways to satisfy your needs and reach your goals.

ACTIVITY: Identify at least 30 consequences and benefits of your eating disorder.  Areas of your life to consider include:

• Physical health
• Mental health
• Emotional well-being
• Spirituality
• Family
• Relationships with others
• Relationship with yourself
• Relationship to your body
• Relationship to food
• Social life
• Education
• Jobs/Career
• Self-worth
• Identity
• Short term and long term goals
• Milestones

Here's a small list to get you started.  I have a running list that I continue to add to, and it now includes over 100 consequences and benefits!  I find it really helpful to look at the massive list of consequences when I am searching for motivation to fight the eating disorder.

Benefits of the Eating Disorder:

1. Numbs difficult emotions
2. Attention and care from others
3. Makes me feel in control
4. Makes me feel powerful
5. I can achieve the goals I set
6. I make connections with others
7. Occupies my mind
8. It's predictable
9. I hate my body less
10. Gives me an identity

Consequences of the Eating Disorder:

1. Missed so many opportunities including school, celebrations and vacations
2. Isolating
3. I can't focus on important issues in therapy
4. Strained relationships with my family
5. Lost friendships
6. I've had to quit work that I enjoy
7. Makes me focus only on myself
8. Impatient with others
9. Health problems
10. I don't feel like I can handle everyday stress